Politics is boring? You CANNOT be serious

Go on, admit it. This election is turning out to be far more exciting, fun and unpredictable than you ever imagined, isn’t it?

Now, I know not everybody subscribes to my long-held belief that politics is the most underrated sport in this country but I really hope that more and more people are enjoying what is turning out to be a splendidly confusing electoral battle.

Let’s be honest, for the past few elections we’ve pretty much known who was going to win before a vote was cast. It’s a bit like watching Premiership football – if you’re a Wigan fan you have great hopes but you always secretly know that Manchester United or Chelsea are going to dash them spectacularly.

But in this General Election absolutely nothing is fixed and all the bosses of all the teams in this year’s campaign must be feeling suddenly very hopeful at the moment.

What really set the rabbit running in the whole campaign was last week’s first ever TV debate between the three main party leaders. I said in this column last week (perhaps more in hope than expectation) that I hoped people would tune in – and millions duly did. And, if that wasn’t enough, many of them clearly changed their vote (or at least their current thinking) on the basis of what they saw.

It was once said in a very different age that a week is a long time in politics – nowadays just 90 televised minutes is all it takes to change a political landscape.

If we agree (and let’s be honest we all agree) that Nick Clegg was the victor on the first night, then both of the other leading candidates shouldn’t panic. Instead they should feel encouraged that a good performance can totally transform perspectives – as Mr Clegg proved last week. It was, after all, only the first of three gruelling boxing rounds.

Before that debate the opinion polls had been steady, if a little inconsistent but afterwards they became confused, if a little crazed. What this showed above all was that none of the parties have clearly made the big breakthrough they yearn for and the electorate is as volatile as an Icelandic volcano.

The national debate has obviously helped keep up the local interest as well and the seats we are covering are very lively indeed.

In Bath, for example, no sooner had we finished putting together a page in the Bath Chronicle asking ten questions to all the candidates we knew about, than another four candidates duly emerged at the last minute to give us all an extraordinarily and unexpectedly diverse choice.

One of the new candidates whose name and identity are not being revealed, certainly caused a stir when he walked into our office looking vaguely like an extra from The Magical Mystery Tour/Mad Max/Rock The Casbah video (take your pick) and from that point on we realised that this campaign was truly a one-off.

Now I know I will never be able to convince everyone that this is all more fun than a night out with Alan Partridge but I just think this election is one that we should revel in because it is just so hard to call. And it is changing by the minute.

The truth is, the only thing that is certain about this election now is that nothing is certain.

Politics fun? You better believe it.

It's the way I tell 'em.....

Last night I had a Chicken Tarka for dinner. It’s a bit like a Chicken Tikka – just a little otter.

No? How about this one? A man walks into a pub and orders a pint of beer and a very small glass of water for his pet amphibian. The landlord says: “Why are you giving him such a small drink?” The man replies: “Because it is my newt”.

I can sense that you’re still not laughing very loudly so I will try one more which should suit the culturally intellectual readers of this fair blog in this fair city.

Shakespeare walks into a bar and the landlord says to him angrily: “Get out William – you’re Bard”.

By now, some of you will hopefully have laughed once, twice or even, if I’m very lucky, three times. Or you might just be thinking this isn’t funny at all, why doesn’t this idiot just get to the point!

Well, today, jokes are the point. For this week we saw the launch of the first Bath Comedy Festival which is hoping to celebrate one of the greatest attributes of the British personality – our sense of humour. As Al Murray says: “Where would we be without humour”? (His answer incidentally is Germany) .

The idea of having a comedy festival here in Bath is a very good one and, in these economically challenging days, it seems that being able to put a brave, smiling face on things may just be an invaluable weapon to help counter the gloom and doom that purveys.

Of course, as the reactions (or perhaps lack of them!) to my earlier jokes will show, one of the joys of humour is that we all have different ideas of what is actually funny.

I’m sure we all know from experience that you can be laughing hysterically at something while the only amusement other people in the room are having is watching your excited reaction. Some of the very best comedy in my opinion – Alan Partridge, Monty Python and both the US and British versions of The Office – leave other people as cold as ice while I, too, can barely raise a grin at other so-called comedy favourites which sell in their bucket loads (Little Britain anyone)? And that is why the comedy festival’s huge variety of different acts, shows, walks and competitions is a great chance for people to tap into what they find personally funny and not worry about those who simply don’t get the joke.

So in wishing the Bath Comedy Festival every success I do hope that everyone can find something to laugh at because, after all, laughter and humour have many great health-giving qualities.

However, as you traipse the streets of the city in the next few weeks, let me give you a of caution. It should be noted that it is actually possible to die of laughing. In the 1970s, a 50-year-old bricklayer laughed so hard and so hysterically at an edition of The Goodies that it tragically killed him.

It sort of adds a new poignancy to the term ‘dead funny’, doesn’t it?